It's not manly to show emotion but they are still there. Ain't No Sunshine: Men Reveal The Pain Of Heartbreak is a collection of stories surrounding the heartbrek men feel when their relationship goes sour and the efforts to keep up the facade of toughness when all they want to do is cry.
An intriguing compilation pulled from many sources, Ain't No Sunshine may be of interest to those who really believe men and women are different and for men who have recently lost.
Midwest Book Review
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I congratulate Kimberley Johnson and Ann Werner on compiling this collection of men's accounts of their breakups. There is a lot I like about 'Aint No Sunshine. The e-book edition is attractive, well organized and easy on the eye. The stories, facilitated by anonymity, display a simple honesty from men that is very touching and quite rare in the regular divorce discourse - a welcome and original addition to divorce literature.
It is interesting to observe the patterns that emerge when couples break up, whether after a brief relationship or after a long marriage, with kids. The initial shock and disbelief is followed by a period of anger which usually recedes over time to be replaced by longings and, in many cases, by moving onto a new life. A few of the men were helped in this process by undergoing therapy of one sort or another.
I found the comments by the professionals insightful. One recommended that men should 'keep busy' post-divorce. Journaling was also considered to be a constructive tactic. It was suggested that men find it harder to 'let go' than women. On this issue, it seems that men experience breakups much as women do but women, who are generally able and willing to express themselves verbally more than men, are better at processing the trauma.
Reading the accounts in the book threw me back to my own divorce; the whole gamut of emotions surfaced. Luckily, with nothing like the intensity they had back then. There is hope in a lot of the stories and overall the book confirms my view that although divorce is usually a nasty business, handled correctly it can lead to better things.
Leo Averbach
Author Of Breakup
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I honestly have to say that I loved this book. The variety of collections were interesting and informative of how men actually react to heartbreak. There were some stories that brought tears to my eyes and I would and will recommend this book to all women and men. Purchasing another copy to send to my friend.
Suri - Amazon
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We all know one guy who is just too sweet. The one who you just know is going to get his heart broken over and over because he isn't afraid to show his emotions.
Then there are all those other guys out there who don't seem to have emotions. Except, apparently, they actually do. Thirty-eight men submitted their stories anonymously, sharing their tales of heartbreak and how they dealt with it. These personal stories are interspersed with professional insights from therapists, psychics, and bartenders. Because where do men turn with their broken hearts? They can't talk to their friends.)
As I read, I put the men into various categories in my mind:
The sweet guy who's skanky girlfriend (or boyfriend) left him (I just wanted to give those guys a big hug and say, "She's not worth it. You deserve better.)
The idiot who is heart-broken because he cheated on his wife and either got caught and lost his wife or broke off with his lover (or she/he broke it off) and is still in mourning. (I just wanted to walk up and smack those guys and tell them what putzes they were.)
The men whose wives/girlfriends had died. Oh my, did I cry.
Women are allowed, even expected and encouraged, to grieve when a relationship ends. We hang out with friends, cry, and tell the whole world what a jerk he is. Men are expected to keep everything inside and never show emotion (unless it involves cars or sports). This book is a great read for women who are wondering if men have feelings. And for men who may not realize that other men actually have feelings, too
Read Full Review Here:
Living, Learning And Loving Life
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This was a sad and very interesting glimpse into the minds of men who are hurting after deaths and breakups. Some hurt just like women do but they mostly keep it inside. I liked hearing all the different stories and was surprised not only by how many men sought therapy, even years after their breakup, but by how many of them chose to not have sex for years afterward.
I do think men are less emotional, at least outwardly, than women and wasn’t surprise to read that a therapist said men tend to express themselves through writing and poetry. I throughly enjoyed this book but wished it could have been longer.
See Full Review here: Bodice Ripper Novels
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WOW!!!!! I read the author's first book The Virgin Diaries and really enjoyed it. I mentioned in my review that it helped me talk with my teen about sex. I thought male heartbreak was an interesting idea and with a low Kindle price, it was a no brainer.
This book is AMAZING! Once I started, I couldn't put it down! I started reading it on a Sunday morning and by the evening, I was finished.
These stories are real. Some break your heart. All make you feel something. These men really blew me away. Men are always so guarded. I know as a woman that they have feelings but because they hide them so well, I can forget that sometimes. But this proves to me that men really love and love hard. When they lose love, they have such a difficult time processing it. Sometimes I finished a story and I would re-read it. Certain stories really stood out for me and touched me.
Five stars. Read this one. These authors have completely impressed me and I can't wait to see what they do next!
Carol Owens Goodreads.com
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Ain't No Sunshine is an honest look into not the minds of men, but their hearts. The breakup of a romantic relationship of any kind is a memorable, and sometimes devastating experience that happens to most of us at one time or another. This book removes the cloak of indifference often given to men, as they sometimes handle the stress of a breakup differently than women. The anonymous interviews reveal that human hearts are fragile regardless of gender. Congratulations, Five Stars!
C. C. Cole Amazon.com
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Ain't No Sunshine is the unofficial memoir of men suffering from heartbreak. Of course us women can understand the pain of heartbreak, we suffer from it continuously but to finally get the input from a man (an insight into their emotions) is truly a gift. It changed my opinion about the male mind and how they feel about their relationships. Honestly, men and women aren't that different when it comes to relationships. They hurt just we hurt. Cry as we cry. Love as we love.
Each story had its own heartache and I couldn't believe how awful the women treated them. The book almost makes us look bad but some of the guys did find true love despite the horrific pain that they suffered. (Shame on those women) For all the women (like myself) who believe that all men are the same, I want you to read this and I know for sure that it will change your opinion.
There are some good guys out there. Perhaps if we stopped leaving the good guys for the bad ones, we'd have happiness. (Not saying that all women do that however).
Anywho, I'd like to thank the men that participated and gave their stories for the world to see. Without them, I might just've stayed home and got nine cats to look after for the rest of my life. (also, not a bad thing. I prefer dogs however).
Secrets of a Mad Hatter Blogspot: Read Full Review Here
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Ain't No Sunshine, compiled and edited by Kimberley A. Johnson & Ann Werner, is sort of like a 'reality show' in print. The book is a collection of stories from men that have gone through a break up.
As women we grow up not only believing that 'letting our feelings show' is a good thing. We not only believe that but we are encouraged to do so. On the flip side of things, men are taught from a very young age that 'crying is for sissies' and it's better to 'suck it up' than to show pain.
With that in mind it is not surprising that we see men showing a different attitude about a breakup than women do. Men seemingly move on with their lives more quickly – even after a major break up. They often begin dating sooner and appear as if everything is fine.
But underneath that composed surface, what is really going on?
These compelling stories will provide you with insight into what men really feel. And ironically, you will probably be able to identify with the emotions expressed. The difference is, most men hide these feelings. And that fact alone could possibly mean that men have a more difficult time dealing with breakups than do women.
Face it, if you are hurting you can disclose that to friends and family members. And in all likelihood you will receive support and comfort. But since most men have this idea that showing feelings is wrong, they must deal with the situation alone. Although their friends and family may 'be there' for them most men feel they need to 'stand tall'.
Each of the stories in 'Ain't No Sunshine' is real and they will touch you in a unique way. In fact, you may change the way you think about men going through tough times in relationships. In the end you will find that although men 'handle' these situations differently than women usually do, that does not minimize the fact that they too feel pain during a break up.
I think you will enjoy this book – and you may want to share it with anyone you know that is going through a difficult period in their relationship. I highly recommend the book – it is definitely a worthwhile read!
Read Full Review Here: Things Women Want.
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I am always curious about how people feel and respond to certain aspects that are natural in life. The stories were amazing. It gave a bit more understanding, and not just a clinical one, to how men feel. They don't react much differently than their female counterpart really. With the possible exception they are more able or willing to hide their feelings. The compiled stories were all interesting and written with such feeling. Some of these men you just wanted to take into your arms and hug until they felt better. The editors/compilers did a wonderful job of choosing the men's stories. I was just all around thrilled with the book. Kudos! Now I want to read one of the editors other bits of work!
Crista goodreads.com
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Ain't No Sunshine is a book compiled by the author containing thirty-eight stories from anonymous men about their heartbreak. Also the thoughts on the subject from therapists, psychics and bartenders.
I really enjoyed reading this Reality Book as the authors like to call it. As with the authors other Reality Book The Virgin Diaries, it gives us insight into something we may not have gotten otherwise. And the way the authors do it is truly amazing. They go straight to the source. Asking for anonymous volunteers to tell their own stories, giving us the chance to know the true feelings, what happened, for how long did it go on, the whys and so on.
Ain't No Sunshine has definitely changed the way I thought men dealt with break-ups. It really gives you the true story, showing that though most think men will just move on right away, that they have just as hard a time going through a bad break up and heartache as women do, if not more sometimes.
This book really surprised me over all, even after reading and loving their other Reality Book. I just did not think it would really be the same as the other one but it was.
One similarity in the authors books was all the emotion that you can feel from the people and their stories of heartache from break-ups to divorce or the death of a partner. I had to stop reading at points to control the water works.
This emotion was present in The Virgin Diaries as well.
There is one story about a Marine who received a Dear John letter, it really shocked me and made my heart ache for him.
This book really made me see that men do not have the liberty to really express how they feel because of being taught that men do not cry or talk about their feelings.
I would recommend this Reality Book to anyone; definitely a book we can all gain knowledge from.
Holly
Read the review on her blog: Fullmoonbites
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Ain't No Sunshine is a compilation of true stories about heartbreaks. The authors requested the help of men to answer some questions. The answers, written in a form of essay, were anonymous so the men weren't ashamed to write down their true feelings. Ain't No Sunshine helps us understand what really goes on inside a man's head. Whether it's from a divorce or death, men struggle from a broken heart. They have some of the same emotions and feelings as women. They have to deal with pain and often, depression. Some admitted they considered suicide while others needed therapy. A few men mentioned not being able to talk about their feelings with their friends because in our society, men are simply not allowed to. Society portrays men as being tough and having no feelings. Women think they have it easy when it comes to breaking up in a relationship but from reading Ain't No Sunshine, this is not the case. The book even offers interviews with therapists, psychics and bartenders. They each share what they've seen and heard from broken-hearted men. The book is also filled with quotes which I thought were very fascinating to read.
Melanie's Book Addiction
Click to read on her blog: http://tinyurl.com/4xao583
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Ain't No Sunshine is a very interesting read for both men and women.
Once started reading this, I literally could not stop. As a woman, I have made certain assumptions about men. They tell you so little. The candor and honesty was not only touching but I look at men a little differently now. The men who gave their stories really opened up and let us in. Can't wait for the next book!
MLK2010 Amazon.com
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This is a great book for any woman who wonders "What a man feels like in a breakup". It's very interesting and captivating. I purchase this for My Brother whom is going through a bad break up and the book helped him. He understood he wasn't alone.
EnnaT Amazon.com